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Post by Eleanor Rigby on Oct 28, 2013 1:16:30 GMT
Believe me, the crap I endured as a child did horrible damage to me which of course set me up to fail miserably at r/s's. I have an immensely difficult time with trust and when I give it to you if you ever betray it I will never trust you again. To be honest I think sometimes I am too stupid or too stubborn to just give up and go mad lol.
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Post by Elementum on Oct 28, 2013 1:34:16 GMT
I can relate to the trust issues more now than before. Brutal. And to think it was a PD husband you married? Same here...but you know what I mean. Just kills me that the one that is closest to you is the one that screws you over. WTF is with that? That is just bs. But hey, that's the way the world works now. Different forms of betrayal. Some I cannot ever trust again, and others, depends what it was and why.
lol no kidding! Madness would release us of the pain and we'd have the perfect excuse to be jerks ourselves. But, too stubborn.
Great Catch 22.
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Post by Eleanor Rigby on Oct 28, 2013 1:46:20 GMT
I think we're too stubborn to go mad really because of that feeling of being out of control lol. It's no wonder I married a PD because he presented himself as something totally opposite of what he truly is and it was awesome to think I had FINALLY met someone normal. LMAO! Boy was the joke ever on me!!
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Post by CGisNuts on Oct 28, 2013 3:45:56 GMT
There is no way in hell I'd ever go back.
I'm enjoying being alone too much. Doing the type of work I'd never be able to do there. Creating things I'd never be able to there cause I'd never have a clear mind to do so.
Right now,if I was there, I'd be trying to write something out, and she'd be watching tv and she'd be freaking I'm not playing with her and she'd start up, blah, blah, ba, ba, baba, blah, ba, blah ba, blah bo, ble bo blah boo, for about 20 minutes, nonstop, same phrases, over andover, constant nonsense and rationalizing silly situations.
And I'd get so frustrated and be stressed out and my mind would be a noodle.
So there is just no way.
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Post by Elementum on Oct 28, 2013 15:27:44 GMT
yep, both of us.
That is a frightening one for me. I have come to very much appreciate my alone time. When stbx is home, I am on edge. It's horrible.
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