Post by Elementum on Sept 24, 2013 3:26:05 GMT
This is a little forensic examination of my not so recent banning from S4M. Rather fascinating given the manner in which it was done. No rules broken. Not unlike 'the site' which is run by hard core co dep PTB. S4M is being run by a covert NPD by the looks of things and based on her actions pretty hard to suggest otherwise. Not to mention that fantastic insight into the CB mindset. More than frightening. I rather doubt that is due to "book learning." Much to her chagrin, I am sure, it was only a waiting game before Guerilla tactics of dealing with a CB would realize the fruits of patience. The good Dr.T in her own words outlined precisely the manner in which she operates. Facts and Evidence don't lie. And fortunately, I am not the only one that has come to a similar conclusion.
www.shrink4menforum.com/showthread.php?6303-Recent-bannings-MeaCulpa-amp-The-Plummer
Dr T post:
Yes you did and without any warning nor reason other than perhaps A**** was irked that I did not rise to her bait when taking one sentence out of context and which anyone with half a functioning neuron if reading in the context of the post would be capable of comprehending. Due to her PD like attack , she was JADE'd. She further coughed hairballs in the trigger thread. Again JADE. I don't argue with crazy. i.e. her pregnancy at 17, married + more kids, divorced and then chasing a married man. Then pissed he goes back to his CB and she enters into childish Facebook wars with his wife. [ based on her posting history and info, her capacity to hold a valid opinion is highly questionable ]
Divisive? Specifically? Nothing specific is there. Just a cocked up PD style accusation.
No facts presented to back up claim.
Dr T. post
Apologize to a CB for her lack of comprehension and twisting my words? I don't think so. JADE. Only once and in that singular post and taken out of context. Apologize for CB lack of comprehension? No.
Read it:
MeaCulpa post
You are familiar with the meaning of Don't= Do not. In this case referencing money and male earning potential.The singular time anything of that nature was ever stated. It was then blown out of proportion and context by a CB. You will do well to note that for future reference. Violent and sexually inappropriate? I talked about what happened to me and in the frequent sex
thread talked about sex in a decent manner and not graphic. Similar topic in yet another forum, and it was not considered graphic? Slime techniques are CB, that is your MO, not mine. What shit tests? Be specific. When accusing, back up your statements. Other than that, all you are posting is CB style rhetoric.
Violence? You watch TV or not?
Dr.T post:
What you 'understand' and what you can Prove are two different things. You are conversant with the concept of Facts and Evidence. Would you like to have our PM's posted? Define "quite a bit" such that you have a measure of some validity.Also a baseless accusation re: create conflict. False. Would you like to see those PM's posted up here? They have nothing to do with the board but were conversations between he and I. And, they are none of your business. None were about stirring conflict, absolutely None. But you are cocking up accusations. That's CB spew. Worse for you, I can prove that. Fortress of Reason? Looks more like the Fortress of CB BullShit trussed up with counseling available from a CB about CB's. Perfect cover.
Dr.T. post:
No comment, I didn't see it and neither do I believe you. Albeit sanctimonious would be yourself to be quite frank. Your lying and spin doctoring is atrocious.
Dr. T post:
No, not claimed. Stated was pretty certain was the same person And I was correct. No, I did Not allege that he treated me poorly while dating. That is not what I wrote in PM to you, nor is it true. Stop your gas lighting and lying. It's banal. And the time line? You did not ask about. And because you can not confirm it, what are you talking about? The history you claim to think you know is false. Pulling factoids out the back end and proffering it up as "proof" is a PD ploy. You seem to be rather adept at that. And to CYB, ban the users that could state the opposite and provide evidence. Mellaril is also aware of the truth. That is most likely why he shut down the thread in good conscience. He knows what I wrote is not what you are currently stating.
Below in quotes. Read it. ABR? Familiarize yourself with the working use of the concept. Also , keeping Logs. You, letting me "Split and Smear Site Admin" where you pull that from? What precisely are you talking about? That's as CB as the CB's you are claiming to "help" save these poor guys from. Shining the light on your lies? That is not splitting, that is only Truth. Try it some time.
Dr. T post:
That is a complete lie. I did not PM Mell to complain. You are lying again. And further, you are also wrong. We did date. I covered for him. As he did for me. We both lied to you. The "attack" guilty of being irritated by his admitted PD move. Correct. And he knew it too. Gaslighting without evidence? Is that what you are talking about? Yes. In fact it is. And this what you
are doing, is Gas lighting , and I have the evidence and shining the light on you. I think the CB question is rather easy to answer.
Yes, it was vulgar and in the open forum had alluded that the other member was to receive it, would I forward it? And I did. Apparently he was in contact with her as well. It seemed so based on the posting. It was my error then. It was to Sheildmaiden and I also wrote that at the top of the PM that it was the post Plummer had alluded to. True or not SM? You remain oddly reticent to admit that. Why is that? Currying favor with the board bully? Common phenomenon.
www.shrink4menforum.com/showthread.php?6146-The-Plummer-s-road-to-recovery/page7
Dr. T. Post:
If MeaCulpa and The Plummer have been corresponding with you via PM or outside of this forum, please exercise caution regarding any identifying information you share with them. I don't know if they knew each other before they joined this forum or if they "clicked" while here.
Only two. And one would be the person you are spewing incorrect information about. That would be why I have a copy of your lying post. Not everyone is blind to your antics.
Now that is a smear with a twist. More crap. "Shocking" what was so shocking? Is it stirring the pot to disagree and question a premise? No, it is not. I don't have to agree with everyone and I don't. Nor did I deliberately instigate any one's misunderstandings, they did a fine job of it on their own.
Who got slimed by whose antics? Gas Lighting and spin doctoring. Your "learning curve" is going to be that Facts are far more reliable than your lies to cover your "decision"/ CYB of banning.
Based on your current actions:
1. Lying
2. Gas lighting
3. False accusations.
4. Totalitarian regime with banning without explanation nor any rules broken.
Looking at a high functioning NPD/ CB female trussed up with a PhD. helping men escape women like herself, because who else could possibly know how twisted their thinking can be. NPD/ BPD and several of the PD's are often found in the "helping" profession. Interesting or not? My T PhD in Cult Abuse, dated a therapist diagnosed with BPD. [ past tense of course] Your actions belie your statements.
Further to which, the guys here have been lulled into a false sense of Trust. Such that any statement to the contrary, even with Cold Hard Facts will cause massive cognitive dissonance. The good Dr. is your "saviour", yes, and an NPD. Beautiful lady as well, ever so disarming or not? Very controlling one at that. She not only banned myself and Plummer, but another fellow earlier on, Why? He posted a rebuttal. I told him not to, he had sent it via PM prior to posting it for my review. Told him, You post
it, she will Ban you. Her NPD mask cannot tolerate any narcisstic injury. 5 minutes later? He was banned. Which only reinforced my working hypothesis of the good Dr.
You are right though. I don't fit in here, nor do I want to. I am not whipped into submission like the others. When someone doesn't understand an idea? What is the normal way of dealing ? You ask for clarification. It's called communication. Agree/ Disagree or agree to disagree.
For the record, I don't care about your banning myself, lying and BS to cover your ass. I care about the false statement that you made with regards to my exBF. As a therapist, if you were firing with all thrusters, you might have recognized the problem with your own lie, but you did not. You did not care, nor consider who you may hurt with that. Extremely ignorant and self serving of you. NPD to the nth degree. Possibly a "moral" sociopath?
It's a given that this will be deleted, but prior to that it will be read by several if not many. Should the good Dr or others wish to further discuss the Gas lighting and Lying of the Admin, this post will also make it's appearance here: boundary.boards.net/board/1/general-board
Classic, you have just proven the working hypothesis with your own words. Most excellent of you.
09-21-2013, 02:43 PM #31
Dr Tara
Dr Tara is offline www.shrink4menforum.com/showthread.php?6601-Overwhelmed-with-the-
narcissistic-onslaught-and-not-sure-if-I-m-handling-this-correct/page4
Guerrilla tactics when dealing with a CB. Truth. It's a beautiful thing. Keep logs.
"The truth shall set you free." and all that sort of thing. It's good stuff.
www.shrink4menforum.com/showthread.php?6303-Recent-bannings-MeaCulpa-amp-The-Plummer
Dr T post:
Hello Everyone,
I recently banned both The Plummer and MeaCulpa. They were not here very long, but were divisive and unnecessarily provocative while they were.
I recently banned both The Plummer and MeaCulpa. They were not here very long, but were divisive and unnecessarily provocative while they were.
Yes you did and without any warning nor reason other than perhaps A**** was irked that I did not rise to her bait when taking one sentence out of context and which anyone with half a functioning neuron if reading in the context of the post would be capable of comprehending. Due to her PD like attack , she was JADE'd. She further coughed hairballs in the trigger thread. Again JADE. I don't argue with crazy. i.e. her pregnancy at 17, married + more kids, divorced and then chasing a married man. Then pissed he goes back to his CB and she enters into childish Facebook wars with his wife. [ based on her posting history and info, her capacity to hold a valid opinion is highly questionable ]
Divisive? Specifically? Nothing specific is there. Just a cocked up PD style accusation.
No facts presented to back up claim.
Dr T. post
MeaCulpa made comments about cutting a man's balls off and many of her other posts were laced with violent and inappropriately sexual overtones. Her posts were, in my opinion, frequently interspersed with shit tests, which other members and myself called her out on repeatedly. She never offered an apology for any of these incidents, just rationalizations and/or she ignored it altogether.
Apologize to a CB for her lack of comprehension and twisting my words? I don't think so. JADE. Only once and in that singular post and taken out of context. Apologize for CB lack of comprehension? No.
Read it:
MeaCulpa post
yeah...you know, the last go round of someone wanting to "take care and provide" didn't go that well. Finding the balance was next to impossible and I gave up too much. Don't want to cut a guy's ballz off out of the gate, but neither will I be dead weight in the r/s.If that makes sense. And when I read the stories of the Gold Digging Whores and the anger from the guys, for good reason.
Where is the balance?
Where is the balance?
You are familiar with the meaning of Don't= Do not. In this case referencing money and male earning potential.The singular time anything of that nature was ever stated. It was then blown out of proportion and context by a CB. You will do well to note that for future reference. Violent and sexually inappropriate? I talked about what happened to me and in the frequent sex
thread talked about sex in a decent manner and not graphic. Similar topic in yet another forum, and it was not considered graphic? Slime techniques are CB, that is your MO, not mine. What shit tests? Be specific. When accusing, back up your statements. Other than that, all you are posting is CB style rhetoric.
Violence? You watch TV or not?
Dr.T post:
During their brief stay, I understand The Plummer and MeaCulpa have been doing quite a lot of PMing behind the scenes. They seem to have been trying to create conflict and engaging in splitting behaviors across the board publicly and privately.
What you 'understand' and what you can Prove are two different things. You are conversant with the concept of Facts and Evidence. Would you like to have our PM's posted? Define "quite a bit" such that you have a measure of some validity.Also a baseless accusation re: create conflict. False. Would you like to see those PM's posted up here? They have nothing to do with the board but were conversations between he and I. And, they are none of your business. None were about stirring conflict, absolutely None. But you are cocking up accusations. That's CB spew. Worse for you, I can prove that. Fortress of Reason? Looks more like the Fortress of CB BullShit trussed up with counseling available from a CB about CB's. Perfect cover.
Dr.T. post:
The Plummer's admission to the forum was my mistake. I thought his username and writing style was familiar. I checked the main site yesterday and sure enough, I had to moderate him there for pushing a Jesus agenda and advice that, in my opinion, that was both PD-like and sanctimonious. His behavior on trifecta's thread yesterday was totally off and his last comment to trifecta was way out of line.
No comment, I didn't see it and neither do I believe you. Albeit sanctimonious would be yourself to be quite frank. Your lying and spin doctoring is atrocious.
Dr. T post:
A few weeks ago, MeaCulpa PMd Mellaril claiming she'd dated a member who has been on the forum for over a year. She alleged that he'd treated her poorly while dating and expressed "concern" for his mental health and claimed he was "talking to [her] in code" in his public posts and PMs to her (*don't know if he actually ever PMd her before she made these claims). Knowing this man's history, her claims and timeline didn't make sense. Something didn't smell right, so I PMd the other member, MeaCulpa and Mellaril and put it out all on the table instead of letting her split and smear site admin and the other member.
No, not claimed. Stated was pretty certain was the same person And I was correct. No, I did Not allege that he treated me poorly while dating. That is not what I wrote in PM to you, nor is it true. Stop your gas lighting and lying. It's banal. And the time line? You did not ask about. And because you can not confirm it, what are you talking about? The history you claim to think you know is false. Pulling factoids out the back end and proffering it up as "proof" is a PD ploy. You seem to be rather adept at that. And to CYB, ban the users that could state the opposite and provide evidence. Mellaril is also aware of the truth. That is most likely why he shut down the thread in good conscience. He knows what I wrote is not what you are currently stating.
Below in quotes. Read it. ABR? Familiarize yourself with the working use of the concept. Also , keeping Logs. You, letting me "Split and Smear Site Admin" where you pull that from? What precisely are you talking about? That's as CB as the CB's you are claiming to "help" save these poor guys from. Shining the light on your lies? That is not splitting, that is only Truth. Try it some time.
From : MeaCulpa
To : Dr Tara
Date : 2013-07-22 18:55
Title : Re: How would you both like to handle this?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Dr. T ,
Looks like I may be mistaken. Talked with XXXXX via PM.
Thank you to simply shine the light on it.
MC
======================================================================
==========
From : MeaCulpa
To : Dr Tara
Date : 2013-07-22 19:02
Title : Re: How would you both like to handle this?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Thank you Dr. T. And also thank you to have the board and for your work. Wish I had found this
board years ago.
Be well.
MC
To : Dr Tara
Date : 2013-07-22 18:55
Title : Re: How would you both like to handle this?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello XXXX and MeaCulpa,
It's come to my attention that the two of you dated at some point. Rather than going back and forth between the two of you individually, I've decided to just put it out in the open as I have no wish to be in the middle of this.
I am unclear as to when you dated as I know XXXX was with his ex, I think, for over a decade, and MC was married for a time as well.It is none of my business what either of you do off the forum. However, if your prior/present relationship becomes a problem on the forum, one of you will likely need to go.
Kind Regards,
Dr Tara
It's come to my attention that the two of you dated at some point. Rather than going back and forth between the two of you individually, I've decided to just put it out in the open as I have no wish to be in the middle of this.
I am unclear as to when you dated as I know XXXX was with his ex, I think, for over a decade, and MC was married for a time as well.It is none of my business what either of you do off the forum. However, if your prior/present relationship becomes a problem on the forum, one of you will likely need to go.
Kind Regards,
Dr Tara
Dr. T ,
Looks like I may be mistaken. Talked with XXXXX via PM.
Thank you to simply shine the light on it.
MC
======================================================================
==========
From : MeaCulpa
To : Dr Tara
Date : 2013-07-22 19:02
Title : Re: How would you both like to handle this?
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Cool! Thank you for clearing this up.
There are so many similarities in abuse victim's stories, which is why there are personality types. It's like they all sprout from the same alien life form pod.
See you on the boards!
T
Dr. T ,
Looks like I may be mistaken. Talked with XXXXX via PM.
Thank you to simply shine the light on it.
MC
There are so many similarities in abuse victim's stories, which is why there are personality types. It's like they all sprout from the same alien life form pod.
See you on the boards!
T
Hello XXXXX and MeaCulpa,
It's come to my attention that the two of you dated at some point. Rather than going back and forth
between the two of you individually, I've decided to just put it out in the open as I have no wish to be in the middle of this.
I am unclear as to when you dated as I know XXXXX was with his ex, I think, for over a decade, and
MC was married for a time as well. It is none of my business what either of you do off the forum. However, if your prior/present relationship becomes a problem on the forum, one of you will likely need to go.
Kind Regards,
Dr Tara
It's come to my attention that the two of you dated at some point. Rather than going back and forth
between the two of you individually, I've decided to just put it out in the open as I have no wish to be in the middle of this.
I am unclear as to when you dated as I know XXXXX was with his ex, I think, for over a decade, and
MC was married for a time as well. It is none of my business what either of you do off the forum. However, if your prior/present relationship becomes a problem on the forum, one of you will likely need to go.
Kind Regards,
Dr Tara
Dr. T ,
Looks like I may be mistaken. Talked with XXXXX via PM.
Thank you to simply shine the light on it.
MC
Thank you Dr. T. And also thank you to have the board and for your work. Wish I had found this
board years ago.
Be well.
MC
Dr. T post:
MeaCulpa wasn't happy with how I handled the situation (i.e., honest, straightforward and above board) and PMd Mell to complain. Turns out, she and the other member had not dated much less met offline. MeaCulpa attacked this member publicly shortly thereafter.
That is a complete lie. I did not PM Mell to complain. You are lying again. And further, you are also wrong. We did date. I covered for him. As he did for me. We both lied to you. The "attack" guilty of being irritated by his admitted PD move. Correct. And he knew it too. Gaslighting without evidence? Is that what you are talking about? Yes. In fact it is. And this what you
are doing, is Gas lighting , and I have the evidence and shining the light on you. I think the CB question is rather easy to answer.
MeaCulpa also forwarded a PM from The Plummer to yet another board member. Why? I don't know. It was a vulgar rant about his ex referencing anal sex and lube. The two of them had not corresponded privately with this other member before and this rant does not appear to have had any relevance in the context with which it was shared.
Yes, it was vulgar and in the open forum had alluded that the other member was to receive it, would I forward it? And I did. Apparently he was in contact with her as well. It seemed so based on the posting. It was my error then. It was to Sheildmaiden and I also wrote that at the top of the PM that it was the post Plummer had alluded to. True or not SM? You remain oddly reticent to admit that. Why is that? Currying favor with the board bully? Common phenomenon.
08-11-2013, 07:57 PM #70
The Plummer
The Plummer is offline
Banned Grasshopper
Join Date
Jul 2013
Posts
111
Re: The Plummer's road to recovery?
Mea, you have my permission to forward the last PM's to SM if you want, but she's got to promise to
keep them hush, hush on the forum.
I think she'd probably beat you to her, don't you
On second thought, maybe not.
The Plummer
The Plummer is offline
Banned Grasshopper
Join Date
Jul 2013
Posts
111
Re: The Plummer's road to recovery?
Mea, you have my permission to forward the last PM's to SM if you want, but she's got to promise to
keep them hush, hush on the forum.
I think she'd probably beat you to her, don't you
On second thought, maybe not.
www.shrink4menforum.com/showthread.php?6146-The-Plummer-s-road-to-recovery/page7
Dr. T. Post:
If MeaCulpa and The Plummer have been corresponding with you via PM or outside of this forum, please exercise caution regarding any identifying information you share with them. I don't know if they knew each other before they joined this forum or if they "clicked" while here.
Only two. And one would be the person you are spewing incorrect information about. That would be why I have a copy of your lying post. Not everyone is blind to your antics.
Additionally, I don't know what MeaCulpa's and The Plummer's agendas were, but they did not seem to be here to give and receive support. They seem to enjoy shocking others, holding forth and stirring the pot for no reason other than to piss people off. Their behavior was such that I found myself wanting to use the Ignore feature for their posts, which will be a future indication to me that the forum member in question is not a good fit for this forum and needs to go.
Now that is a smear with a twist. More crap. "Shocking" what was so shocking? Is it stirring the pot to disagree and question a premise? No, it is not. I don't have to agree with everyone and I don't. Nor did I deliberately instigate any one's misunderstandings, they did a fine job of it on their own.
I apologize to anyone who has been slimed by these two and their antics. I should have banned MeaCulpa after her balls cutting statement. This is the first forum I have presided over (and belonged to), so I appreciate everyone's patience with my learning curve.
Who got slimed by whose antics? Gas Lighting and spin doctoring. Your "learning curve" is going to be that Facts are far more reliable than your lies to cover your "decision"/ CYB of banning.
Based on your current actions:
1. Lying
2. Gas lighting
3. False accusations.
4. Totalitarian regime with banning without explanation nor any rules broken.
Looking at a high functioning NPD/ CB female trussed up with a PhD. helping men escape women like herself, because who else could possibly know how twisted their thinking can be. NPD/ BPD and several of the PD's are often found in the "helping" profession. Interesting or not? My T PhD in Cult Abuse, dated a therapist diagnosed with BPD. [ past tense of course] Your actions belie your statements.
Further to which, the guys here have been lulled into a false sense of Trust. Such that any statement to the contrary, even with Cold Hard Facts will cause massive cognitive dissonance. The good Dr. is your "saviour", yes, and an NPD. Beautiful lady as well, ever so disarming or not? Very controlling one at that. She not only banned myself and Plummer, but another fellow earlier on, Why? He posted a rebuttal. I told him not to, he had sent it via PM prior to posting it for my review. Told him, You post
it, she will Ban you. Her NPD mask cannot tolerate any narcisstic injury. 5 minutes later? He was banned. Which only reinforced my working hypothesis of the good Dr.
You are right though. I don't fit in here, nor do I want to. I am not whipped into submission like the others. When someone doesn't understand an idea? What is the normal way of dealing ? You ask for clarification. It's called communication. Agree/ Disagree or agree to disagree.
For the record, I don't care about your banning myself, lying and BS to cover your ass. I care about the false statement that you made with regards to my exBF. As a therapist, if you were firing with all thrusters, you might have recognized the problem with your own lie, but you did not. You did not care, nor consider who you may hurt with that. Extremely ignorant and self serving of you. NPD to the nth degree. Possibly a "moral" sociopath?
It's a given that this will be deleted, but prior to that it will be read by several if not many. Should the good Dr or others wish to further discuss the Gas lighting and Lying of the Admin, this post will also make it's appearance here: boundary.boards.net/board/1/general-board
Classic, you have just proven the working hypothesis with your own words. Most excellent of you.
09-21-2013, 02:43 PM #31
Dr Tara
Dr Tara is offline www.shrink4menforum.com/showthread.php?6601-Overwhelmed-with-the-
narcissistic-onslaught-and-not-sure-if-I-m-handling-this-correct/page4
I thought this was just anecdotal based on my work experiences and the stories shared on S4M.
Is there actual research on this? If so, do you have the citations?
My thoughts on why they choose these professions (mental health included) are:
1. Narc supply
2. Camouflage (i.e., What do you mean that special needs teacher abuses you, cheated on you and maxed out your credit cards? She's so good with the children! I just can't believe it!)
3. Power/control over the weak, sick and vulnerable.
Is there actual research on this? If so, do you have the citations?
My thoughts on why they choose these professions (mental health included) are:
1. Narc supply
2. Camouflage (i.e., What do you mean that special needs teacher abuses you, cheated on you and maxed out your credit cards? She's so good with the children! I just can't believe it!)
3. Power/control over the weak, sick and vulnerable.
Guerrilla tactics when dealing with a CB. Truth. It's a beautiful thing. Keep logs.
"The truth shall set you free." and all that sort of thing. It's good stuff.
