Why do we stay?

Women in abusive relationships may experience high levels of dissonance resulting from their negative attitude towards the abuse in the rela-tionship and their inability to leave the relationship. If they feel ―trapped‖ in the relationship, they may be inclined to change their negative attitude pertaining to the relationship or the abuse, whether they know it or not. While changing their attitude to be more positive towards the relationship and the abuse will reduce any experienced dissonance, a newly positive outlook on abuse could be more dangerous - leaving the relation-ship may become more difficult if the abused woman has a positive outlook on the relationship and/or abuse. Once the woman commits to an attitude change that results in her adopting positive feelings towards the abusive relationship, she will continue to have those positive emotions due to the human nature of wanting to remain consistent with our thoughts and actions; therefore, reducing dissonance. For example, a woman who gradually becomes exposed to violence may justify the abuse as much as necessary to make it seem less dangerous. These justifications may lead her to unknowingly change her attitude of abuse over time.